Do you put joy, happiness and purpose FIRST on your schedule?
Or do you focus on work first?
Do your focus on over achieving or achieving all the time?
How does one create joy and purpose?
Is it through achieving? Or managing expectations on yourself?
So many struggle with this, especially during the holidays and the hustle and bustle of life.
As we wind down 2021, we wanted to bring this powerful positive message to you today with Lucy Liu.
Lucy Liu is a global business strategist and certified life coach helping high achieving women in life transitions unstuck, kiss overwhelm bye, cultivate Rockstar confidence, see clarity, reach dream goals, and live a joyful fulfilling life! She is an unshakable optimist, wife, mother, easy-going entrepreneur, certified #IamRemarkable women empowerment workshop facilitator, and international motivational speaker. She is the author of two international bestselling books The Rising Sisterhood and Asian Women Who Boss Up. She also inspires as the host of her weekly podcast The Lucy Liu Show, which is the fueling station for your mind, business and life. She has been featured in Medium, VoyageLA, Elephant Journal, ThriveGlobal, FOX, CBS, NBC and dozens of other media outlets.
Get her happiness tool kit instantly at https://www.lucyliucoaching.com/
If you would like to learn more about Coach Lois’ future and past guests, go to www.healthynwealthynwise.com
For more of her amazing resources, as well as her guests free gifts, go to www.loiskoffi.com/podcast
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Are you living your best life as a salesperson or entrepreneur? Or do you find you’re working all the time on this hamster wheel of life while stressed out and not financially free, which is the exact opposite of what you have signed up for, especially now in this global pandemic? If this is you, you are not alone. I found myself there in 2008 when I lost everything, including my health and had to pivot working from home for the first time with no money, I rebuilt my life from scratch, juggling motherhood and marriage to get my life back and be recession and pandemic proof.
Today now we live laptop lifestyles with our kids and our poised to travel the world together. How did we do it? Join me as I share my health and wealth and wisdom, secrets, tips, tools and expert interviews to equip you to be recession proof and live your best life. My name is Louis Kofi, and this is healthy and wealthy and wise.
Well, all right. And happy day to you. This is coach. Lois, whenever you’re watching this, I just want to say thank you for taking time and investing in your best health, your best wealth, and your best wisdom. As always, I’m your coach, sharing with you amazing experts with Nuggets of wisdom for you to live your best life. And today we have Lucy Liu all the way from oh, my gosh, overseas. And we met on LinkedIn. I believe. Right. And she’s a speaker and author and a coach and super fired up about her passion and her purpose and helping you be inspired today.
So, Lucy, I’m going to turn it right over to you because we’ve got only so much time. I know you have a lot of wisdom to share to my audience. Tell us more about your story and how you got to be where you are today.
Well, thank you so much for having me, Lois. It’s such an honor to be here. And if you’re tuning in, thank you. So I am originally from Los Angeles, by the way. So, yes, I’m overseas, and it’s a small world now that we’re all virtual. Right. I personally transformed my own life from being an overstressed, unhappy, and unhealthy, unfulfilled entrepreneur at one point in my life to living my life now of joy, fulfillment, mindfulness and all that good stuff. And that’s why I love to help other women to make that kind of life changing transformations.
I have made a lot of both moves in my life to create that more aligned, healthy and fulfilling life. And I really hope to inspire as many women as possible or a few men. So that’s what I do now. I coach women and mostly entrepreneurs to have life with purpose, with confidence and with so much joy oozes of joy so that you can transform your personal life and therefore transform your business.
Oh, my gosh. I love that you’re speaking my language because you said two words that I’m just going to jump on because I said them today to other people, purpose and joy. I see a lot of people out there who are struggling with both. So maybe can you share with us more about how does someone tap into purpose and joy right now?
Wow. I always have my clients start by making a list of Joy activities. We are always thinking about our business plans. We’re thinking ahead, we’re thinking about money, but sometimes we get lost in the hustle. We’re not really thinking about us. And I am really a big advocate. I would say a catalyst for joy because I now put that first before anything else. I get the luxury now to enjoy living my life and not just to live life, but really to live every moment, every day and design life like how I want to live.
For example, what I used to do wrong is that I schedule work and then our life becomes around work, especially I worked for myself. And if you’re working for yourself, you always get lost because your life and business gets mixed up. Sometimes it’s hard to draw that line between living and working anymore. I don’t know if you’ve been there, Loie, but that’s not a fun place to be at number six. What was wrong was that I put down my work schedule first, but now I do it the other way around.
I always have my clients list down their non negotiables and put those in your calendar first, and then you list all the things that makes you joyful and make sure those are also on your calendar before you open up your calendar to have those calls to have those work related activities, right? Or else we’re going to always not have time to attend. Our non negotiables and our own non negotiables are so important in life because that drives us going further. So if you want to read, make sure you have reading time blocked off.
If you want to get to the gym, make sure you have time in your calendar for the gym and everything else. I have clients who love Netflix who love binging on their favorite dramas. If that’s you make sure you block off your Friday night Saturday night or whenever that makes you happy. And I think because if you choose Joy, if you choose to live a life you want, you have to attend those non negotiables.
Oh, my gosh, I love that. And I guess I’ll play Devil’s advocate because I have been there to your point. When the pandemic hit, I call it the Great Pause. Now they’re actually calling it the Great Resignation because a lot of people have resigned from their work, their jobs, the Jo B world because they weren’t satisfied. They realized, oh, my gosh, I’m just doing this kind of as a placeholder for what I’m truly passionate about and to figure out that purpose right to figure out that joy a lot of people who maybe weren’t entrepreneurs before now they’re becoming entrepreneurs.
I’ve seen a lot of people spread themselves too thin, saying yes to all these opportunities, all these things. And I know for me I was there, thankfully, before the pandemic, the pandemic woke me up, gave me a good slap and say, yeah, that’s not no. You don’t need to do that anymore because I was people pleasing. I was bending her backwards, saying yes to too many things. Right. So when you talk about putting your non negotiables on the calendar, your activities for joy, at least in America, right.
That is so opposite to what we’ve been brainwashed for. Lack of a better word. Right. It’s all about work making money, success. Right. So do you have any way that people can flip that script to get rid of that scarcity? There’s not enough time. There’s not enough money so that they put themselves first because I’ve seen so many people struggle with doing what you just said.
Absolutely. The pandemic is such a blessing for so many, though I’ve seen it. I know it’s really sad. We were all going through a very tough time. I personally had anxiety attacks that I didn’t have for a whole decade. Probably right. But it’s all the personal development that we learned along the way. You get to take out those tools. And that’s why personal development is so important, no matter what stage of life you’re in. And I also agree with you. It’s all about perspective. The pandemic has brought so much blessings to a lot of people.
I had clients who were laid off because of the pandemic that were finally able to grow their business or side hustle to where they actually want them to be, and they surpass their income by far, even before the pandemic. But you wouldn’t do that. You actually wouldn’t go for it. You wouldn’t take the leap. If not, you actually got fur, loaded or laid off. So many blessings are always disguised. And to your point about our culture, we know that if you’re going through a traditional school, you’re going through the traditional educational system.
We’re not taught personal development. We’re not taught how to be an entrepreneur. And the same way if you continue that education, if you continue to that career path, you go to work. And it’s all about work. I majored in economics myself, and I was always in business, and it’s always the hustle. And yes, hustle works. Your working ethics, your hard work does pay off at some point. But if you don’t take personal development as your priority at some point in your life, you’re going to have a burnout.
There’s going to always be a point where hustle stop working for you and all those good things that you learned in school stopped working for you because you’re overachieving. There’s a difference between high achieving and overachieving. I can say I am a woman who is high achieving. I’m high performance. When I work, I perform highly and I’m productive during those shorts for working times. And I’m highly motivated because I know what my motivators are and I set the right rewards. So I am motivated and high performing and high achieving.
But what I say now is I’m an X. Over achiever. I don’t overachieve anymore because overachieving leads to burnout. And what overachieving could look like is like you expect too much, right? It’s good that we set high standards, but if you expect too much, it guarantees that you’re never satisfied with what you have now. And that’s what mindfulness is about. And that leads to a bunch of problems, like perfectionism, because if you want the perfect outcome, you’re just setting your standards way over. You’re really doomed for disappointment and stress and all the stuff you don’t want in your life.
And I think in our culture we want to be the best. Right? However, sometimes when we’re so focused on that mountain peak, we’re climbing this mountain, we want to be the best. We’re going uphill right. When you’re not at the peak, it brings you negative feelings. But unfortunately, those negative feelings trigger negative thoughts, and then those negative thoughts bring you will influence you to say negative things to yourself. You all have that little voice in our head, and that negative attitude will lead us to take more negative actions, and as a result, lead to undesirable results.
So it’s kind of like a spiral that we don’t want. And that’s why we need to learn to back off and not be so hard on ourselves and know that you have the luxury of putting yourself first. So you’re the expert. You want to be the expert or something, but you don’t have to be actually the best, because sometimes we get trapped in the wordplay right. There’s no need to put shame on yourself for not feeling like you’re the best. Like I talked about this mountaintop.
I want you to enjoy the journey at every stage of this beautiful mountain, right? And even if you take a wrong turn like you talked about earlier, if you’re spreading yourself two things and you realize some of the things you’re doing is wrong and not helpful for your business or your life, you’re still learning. It’s not really a complete wrong turn. You’re still learning, and your lessons are always going to be greater than things you haven’t done. So enjoy the journey and stop in between to smell the flowers.
Look at the bees and bird watch. Cloud Watch. Really take that moment. Enjoy every step along the way.
I love that you’re reminding me. I’m reading a book. I was referred it back when it was published. I think early 2000s the Power of now by Eckertole. Great wake up call for me and so many because I think there’s a lot of myself included recovering overachievers, right. Perfectionism. I like the high achiever, but the perfectionism, the imposter syndrome. Let’s talk about that a little bit, especially when it comes to because I’m a lead generation and sales expert, and I’d love to get your take as a fellow coach who cares about the truth where people are at.
And a lot of times we have that fake it until you make it, got to succeed, got to make the next sale kind of mindset. That perfectionist mindset. And I know I’m not just speaking for myself, but a lot of people out there is. How do you enjoy the clouds? Enjoy the coffee, the roses, whatever. While you’re also kind of like battling that inner perfectionist. And when it comes to the sales process, do you know what I’m saying? Am I making sense?
Well, for one, I’m definitely an expertionist, right? Because we’ve all been there. It’s just a fun place to be. But that also by itself, is a great lesson, because you can’t get to the point where you spell the flowers and look at the clouds without actually first being somewhat stressed or burned out. But that’s the beauty of realizing what’s important in your life. Really take time to list out your values and priorities. It’s so important that you know your own values and priorities. Right. So you want to make money.
But why do you want to make money? Right. So you probably want to make money so that you have the freedom to stop by and smell the flowers and look at the clouds and be chilling by the beach and laying out on your lounge chair.
So those are the things that you want to do, and that’s why you’re doing what you’re doing. Why not do them now? Because it’s not about faking on the outside who you are. It’s about embodying that version of you that’s already there. It’s inner work, and your inner mindset has to be there before you actually get there. Right. So if you want to be this seven figure business owner for say, for example, and you say, oh, once I get there, I’ll be happy. Once I get there, I will go lay out.
But it doesn’t work that way, because once you’re there, you’re going to be thinking about a figures. You’re going to be thinking about more money and more work, and that leads to more stress. So it’s about how you live now. It’s about embodying that version of you now, whereas if you want to lay out you’re already there, it’s done. There’s no question asked. So if you want to enjoy your life, it can happen now, because that’s important to you. You have to embody that version of you and ask yourself, what would she or he say to the version?
Now, what would they do? What would they be doing? You have to be in that version of you because your wisdom, your well of wisdom is already inside of you. It just might be covered by some bushes. And the more you’re in a rushing state or faking state, you’re not going to be able to see that well of wisdom.
I love that you’re speaking my language, which I knew, like 20 years ago, got lost along the way. And you’re reminding me of what Zig, Ziegler and some of the greats and even Ecker totally talked about. You got to be more do less in America, especially. We’re so addicted to those doing things right. And to just be and relax and embody, that not going to lie. That’s counterintuitive to our culture. What is it like overseas where you are at? Have you seen anything different? I’m just curious.
And then I’ll ask you a couple more questions as we wrap it up.
Oh, it’s worse. It’s definitely worse in Asia. And I would say that’s a major reason my parents immigrated to America so that I can get the education and the freedom and all the good stuff that comes with American education. But Unfortunately, I became an entrepreneur because I come from an entrepreneurial family. Even my grandparents were in business. So I think the formal education is like your I would say it was a backup for me. Like, if all else fail, let’s use this diploma. Let’s use this diploma to find a job.
So that’s how I looked at it for me personally, but it’s not helpful for you. Probably if you want to go into business, but always there’s different perspectives, right? There’s always business clubs, there’s even coaching clubs now. And today nowadays there’s free consultants at school. All the resources are out there. I really think we live in a time and period in our lives where it’s just we’re so lucky to have all the resources in the whole world now to help you. If you Google right. If you look through podcast, I mean, listen to podcast, look through blog posts.
You have all the resources available, but only when you invest in yourself are you really going to do the work right? It’s a totally different mindset when you actually invest in yourself than just to be listening to podcasts and reading books like Jim Quick would say, just shelf help instead of self help. And it’s putting those books on your bookshelf not going to do any good for you.
Yeah, there’s no action. I call it inspiration constipation, right? A lot of great ideas, a lot of raw ran. That’s a take away from Tony Robbins, but he’s really great at upselling you on the next course. The next thing that may or may not actually get you to take action. So I totally resonate with that. Is there any other nugget before I ask you my final question that I always love to ask of all of my guests? Is there anything else that is really on your heart that you want to make sure you share to my healthy and multi and wise group today?
Well, you talked about professionalism. So I would definitely say that. Don’t be a superhero to everybody, right? Don’t just always say yes. You’re going to be overbooked, overwhelmed, stressed out, and we don’t want that. So create an easy life. Live life in the moment. I know it’s counterintuitive, but be confident that you get to live your life the way you desire and be confident that an easier life is possible. You are the superhero for yourself. Yes, and you are here to make a contribution to the world, but your people out there.
But don’t kill yourself for not being able to help everyone in the world.
Oh, my gosh. I love that. Thank you. That was something that I recognized thanks to the great pause of 2020. I always love to close with the same question because I love to learn from my guests when you hear the phrase healthy, wealthy and wise, which is the name of my show. And it’s also the name of my signature coaching program has a lot of meaning to me. However, I would love to know to see what does healthy and wealthy and why it means to you when you hear that price.
It means it’s a lifestyle that you can have easily accessible too. It’s a decision. I would say it’s a decision you have to intentionally consciously choose to live your life healthy, wealthy and wise.
That’s awesome. I love that. I’ve never had anyone say that, but you’re right. It is a decision. So is there any free gift or offering you want to share? Where can people find you online and to be able to learn more about you?
Well, to start, come listen to my podcast. It’s also everywhere podcasts are available. It’s called The Lucyloo Show. It’s L-U-C-Y-L-I-U show and I am at lucyloucoaching. Com and say Hello to me on Instagram at Handle. M-S-L-U-C-Y-L-I-U. And actually I pretty much have the same handle across all social media.
Awesome. We’ll make sure we put that in the show notes. Thank you so much for giving us your wisdom and your time and energy today and your love and compassion. I hope you guys felt that because it’s really all about giving yourself compassion and love first, putting your oxygen mass on first. Finding those places to put joy in your life every day. Making you a priority is what I got out of today’s show. So I’d love for you guys to leave a review, give us a five star rating or whatever rating you want to give us and let us know what you like best about the show until next time.
Here’s your best health, your best wealth and your best wisdom. Thanks, guys. Bye bye for now.
Bye. Hey, guys.
Thank you so much for listening to this episode. If you enjoyed this, please subscribe refer a friend and please drop me a rating or a review. If you do that. I’ll reward you with a free 20 minutes free coaching session on crafting your journey to your best self. Reach out to me at Lois. At loiscoffee. Com to claim your 20 minutes slot until next time. Be healthy. Wealthy and wise.